Andrew Breitbart: Mall Cop

Cow Towing to Other Countries

Is It Just Me Or Does This Thing Read Like a Masturbation Fantasy

with one comment

resident-evil-apocalypse-jill-valentine12And so is a young woman who absolutely sticks out in the gun shop. She’s wearing a cream colored linen baby doll with blue grosgrain trim; on her feet, pink flip-flops that pop off alabaster skin. Her hair is the color of golden Kansas wheat. Mid-twenties, she’s an iconic all-American beauty who makes me flash to memories of a truly insane childhood crush: Tuesday Weld as Thalia Menninger on The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis.

Looking as if she’s on the edge of a meltdown, she paces, glances nervously at the display cases lined with gleaming rows of pistols and revolvers. She makes a move to exit the gun shop, then returns, as if yanked by a fishing reel.

“Excuse me, do you, do you know about guns?”

She’s even got that vulnerable, tremulous Tuesday Weld pitch to her voice.

And she is talking to yours truly.

“A bit.”

I like how, in the “resolution” section, old boy actually expects us to believe this happened to him.  Then he posts, like, a foot fetish picture.  I usually think it’s counter-productive when liberals’ only response to gun nuts is to make penis jokes, but it’s not subtextual here, it’s straight up fucking textual.

I mean, you’ll find few people more willing than I to see abusers shot in the fucking face, but the damsel-in-distress/vulnerable/hysterical woman fetishizing, coupled with the leering tone, is just completely icky.


Written by dieblucasdie

April 7, 2009 at 3:31 pm

One Response

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  1. i feel u r so hott as well as so sexy.


    July 17, 2010 at 2:07 am

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